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Mentoring Mankind with Memories and Musings

Dec 18,   Red Letter Days Mark Milestones
Dec 17,   Today Was a Red Letter Day
Dec 1,   the 2nd Year of My Voyage is Over
Nov 20,   I Find Family and Friends at Hallmark
Nov 5,   My Book From the Male Viewpoint
Oct 12,   Music & Movies Mark My Milestones
Sep 18,   My New Life Appears on the Horizon
Aug 23,   Life is a Pathway with Many Forks
Aug 21,   The Importance of Doing My Best
Aug 4,   Life Imitates Hello Myrmidon
Aug 1,   Writing a Book Has Changed My Life
Jun 13,   Plants are Amazing Creatures
May 25,   Will You Accept My Apology?
May 1,   A Journal is a Window on Your Life
Apr 30,   A Road Trip to Shangri La
Apr 25,   Movies as Matchmakers
Apr 23,   Me at Seventy-Three!!!
Apr 19,   Make Time for Your Friends
Apr 14,   Can One Make a Difference?
Apr 9,   a snipit from HELLO MYRMIDON
Apr 1,   What Price Glory, Sweat, Tears
Mar 30,   To Retrieve or Not Retrieve
Mar 29,   Discourse on Decisions
Mar 25,   Memory Retrieval
Mar 24,   I Join the World Community
Mar 22,   Website Lessons
Mar 3,   My Miracles, Part 2
Mar 2,   My Miracles, Part 1
Feb 9,   Phones of Old, Part 2
Feb 8,   Phones of Old, Part 1
Feb 7,   Twitterpated!!!
Jan 25,   Jacob and Esau, Part 2
Jan 24,   Jacob and Esau, Part 1
Jan 10,   A New Goal?
Jan 9,   My Earliest Memories
Dec 31,   2016: Successes and Failures
Dec 30,   2016: My Self-Discovery
Dec 28,   I Finally Hear My Angels
Dec 27,   Angels and Me
Dec 26,   Angels Inspire Me
Dec 24,   the Littlest Angel
Dec 23,   Story of My Name Part 3
Dec 22,   Story of My Name Part 2
Dec 21,   Story of My Name Part 1
Dec 19,   Prior Challenges Part 2
Dec 17,   Prior Challenges Part 1
Dec 16,   My Website Challenge
Dec 15,   Astrological Review of 2016
Dec 14,   North Coast Winter
Dec 13,   an Angelic Intervention
Dec 12,   Birth of HELLO MYRMIDON
Dec 11,   Christmas Lights Fade
Dec 10,   Christmas Art Project
Dec 9,   Finding a Perfect Tree
Dec 6,   Christmas around the World
Dec 4,   Mom’s Story Part 2
Dec 3,   Mom’s Christmas Story Part 1
Dec 2,   Ghosts of Christmas Past
Dec 1,   My First Blog

Guest Blogs

Mar 24,   SusanDay on Being a Grandparent

7th Dec Christmas with KW

So far in my review of Christmas past, there is evidence of the usual trappings, although the Christmas spirit remained absent or at least muted. But in 1974 KW entered the scene. He came from a family of 6 kids, who lived in a very small house and had very little money to provide Christmas cheer. Now that he was in his own place, he wanted to compensate for what he missed as a child by having all the trappings and showering me with gifts. He was a log truck driver, but was laid off for the winter, so we didn’t have a lot of money right then either. To have a tree we went to a vacant property he knew about and cut a small scrub pine tree. For decorations we used a tattered string of lights and some old ornaments that he got from his folks. We were fine with that, because we knew we would be at my mom’s place for Christmas so we didn’t need to have a lot of decorations in our apartment.

Christmas itself was less than 2 months after we met, but we started accumulating a few items to make our life easier right away. He had good credit at the local appliance store, so first it was a freezer so we could keep all the fish we were given, since he had many friends that were commercial fishermen. Then it was a dish washer, because I had made clear from the beginning my distaste for washing dishes by hand. One day I mentioned that a small toaster oven would be very handy, so he decided to get me one for Christmas.

He did not have any experience with them, so he went to the appliance store and asked them for the biggest and best one they had. And that is what he proudly brought home and wrapped for me. When I opened it on Christmas I knew right away it was not what we needed, but I did not let on. And when I appeared very pleased with it he got tears in his eyes because he was so happy to see that. I knew right then that I could never complain about anything he bought for me, because he had done his best to make me happy without any experience with the products. So the effect of that Christmas experience lasted throughout our 35 years together, but after that I did make sure that I was at least in on every major purchase.

I am really glad I figured that out right at the beginning, because I did break my rule one time a few years before he died. I made him return an item he bought for me because it wasn’t good enough, and he carried the pain of that failure to his grave. It is definitely worth remembering that there are some seemingly minor events that result in lessons learned and decisions made at Christmas that actually influence our lives from that time on. It is important to be aware that this happens, and to be careful that we learn the lesson if possible on the first go around, so that we don’t do like I did and cause unneeded pain. I could have kept the band saw he bought for me, but I had already planned to buy the one I wanted, and just didn’t think about his feelings. Having realized my mistake, later I allowed him to buy me another one, bigger but very poor quality. It made him happy, and I just lived with it. I couldn’t hurt him again.


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